Engrish

Here are just two examples of some of the Engrish I see around town every day. I chose these two as they have the same sort of "The Simpson's Halloween Special" menu theme, or maybe that's just my own interpretation because Sarah just bought the full 18 seasons of The Simpsons on DVD (all for a whopping $30). Once again, sorry for the lack of quality, but I think you'll get the idea.

Macaroni with harm and cheese: AaahhHH!

Screambled Eggs: WooOOOoooo!

Weekly Randomness

Seeing as I've decided to entertain, well, probably nobody but myself and start blogging again, I thought it would be a good idea to introduce a weekly pic or two that I've snapped with my trusty, rusty Samsung mobile phone - don't ask me what brand it is: it's an E-something. Just a little taste of everyday life here in the big Ho Chi.

Please respect the effort made to bring you these Pulitzer-winning beauts as they were often taken at the greatest risk of bodily harm. In other words, I was driving my motorbike with one hand and trying to focus, zoom, hold still and snap some absurd scene with my other hand, mostly at speeds between 10 and 25 kms an hour.

These wonderful mobile photos will continue to be presented weekly until I drop my phone or myself from my motorbike for the last time. Either way, enjoy them while they last!

Tunnel Vision: Behold the xich lo (cyclo) driver delivering rolled-up sheets of randomness

Postcard Angkor vs Angkor What?!

This is it. Rising out of the steaming jungle as you tuk-tuk your way past fruit purveyors, tourist buses and other tuk-tuk’s, the five towers of Angkor Wat jut out beyond the safeguarding temple walls, just beyond the massive moat. This is it, you think to yourself, one of those rare Indiana Jones moments, where you get to scramble over timeworn, venerable blocks of Khmer architecture in the overgrown Ta Prohm temple, or push the left eye of a Naga statue or Bayon head to reveal a secret passageway which leads you the discovery of the Hall of Bodhisattvas…oh behold the wonders of Angkor!

A World Heritage Site nearly a millennium old, regal Angkor Wat has stood the test of time to watch nations rise only to fall again and has stood proudly as religions have come and gone. Weather-stained massifs watch over the jungle of Siem Riep as sentinels and guardians, while intricately designed passageways and walls pay homage to Hindu and Buddhist mythology.

The austerity and monumental scale of the Angkor Temple Complex are palpable as hours, even days, are whittled away, inspecting every nook and cranny.

But, alas, you are not alone. No, it’s not the shade of Vishnu or Kali still haunting Angkor Thom or the spectres of long-forgotten Buddhist monks haunting the fields and buildings of Angkor. It’s something else, it’s…other people like you: tourists.



And this is the downside. I was first astounded by Jon’s exposé on the nature of the Angkor Temple Complex and now I’ve seen it for myself. This is the Angkor they don’t want you to see. Thousands of tourists descend on the Temples daily. This is the jostling, elbowing, kicking, biting Angkor. The souvenir-touting, Canon-clicking, elephant-riding, get out of my picture Angkor. You won’t find a picture of this one at any of the gazillion postcard sellers around the temple complex. This is commercialism at its sweaty, dizzied height. The, reduced, scarred essence of greed.

Peruse a detailed, weathered bas-relief, follow the design around a corner and *kadonk* bump into the lens of another Pentax-touting fellow. At times you just wish everyone else would disappear and leave you alone to explore in peace.

Erosion has caused large sections of the temple complex to be closed temporarily for reconstruction and in some places, sadly, permanently. Monks wander around with mobile phones and digital cameras (so much for discarding all your worldly possessions).

It’s a circus; nearly as much so as the town of Siem Riep. The “Angkor” brand has been cashed in on – there is even an Angkor Mart – with a very nice selection of imported chocolates and a range of French and New World wines to warm the heart of any wine enthusiast. Angkor this, Angkor that, it was a kind of overkill, yet inevitably so I guess, looking at the laws of economics: supply and demand. I can just see Smith’s invisible hand reaching for a cold Angkor quart, or changing the setting on his Cybershot.





Despite Angkor’s “I’m lovin’ it” commercialism, it remains – hidden beneath the mountain of souvenir t-shirts, row upon row of fake antiques and beneath the froth of Siem Riep’s cappuccinos and latte’s – one of the world’s most important historic areas for a number of reasons and hopefully this significance will not only be a footnote at the bottom of an Angkor advertisement.

Hola!

Just a quick word in to break, to borrow the overused term, the hiatus (gotcha Brian!). Things have been progressing steadily. We moved into our new place this weekend and everything went pretty smoothly. The next issue is getting the internet and cable hooked-up, thus the photos of Cambodia, which should have been up nearly a month ago, will have to wait a few more weeks. Hopefully once everything is settled things will regain a semblance of normality (ie: regular, once-in-a-blue-moon-after-the-cow-jumped-over-it-and-hell's-frozen-over, kind of posts).

Chiars!

Pics from the Saigon Zoo...err Xu

Here are some pictures from Sarah and Christoff’s combined “Quarter of a Century” birthday party at Xu in Saigon. Just for the record, the “blurred background” and “intelligent lighting” effects were the desired and intended outcomes of the photographer (which, in most cases, was not me) and in no way reflect the level of inebriation of the above-mentioned artist.

If you come from Dalat, are you “Dalatian”?

I felt a bit like Duncan MacLeod from Highlander as we descended to Lien Khang Airport, minus Queen’s epic “Princes of the Universe”, Christopher Lambert’s cheesy haircut and killer sword (so I guess I felt very little like Duncan MacLeod in fact). The only thing in common was actually the aspect of “highlands”, the term with which one could describe Dalat’s surroundings.

View of the countryside

See, Sarah and I flew up to Dalat in Vietnam’s Central Highlands region, about 300 km from HCM City (and only 45 minutes by plane), to celebrate her birthday last weekend. The first thing we noticed was the cool weather, a distinct difference from the sweltering humidity of Saigon. Even while cruising mountain passes in search of the next waterfall, the temperature was never uncomfortably cold – just nippy enough to put a spring in your step.

Sarah at the Datanla Falls about 7 km outside Dalat

The second thing you notice is the change of scenery. It’s green, as in Jolly Green Giant green, everywhere. As you take the 25 km journey from the airport to the city, or should I say town as its population is less than 200 000, the scenery changes from rural, ramshackle abodes with pale green, checkered patches of various vegetables in the yard (you know the kind – with the scrawny chickens scratching in the dust), to imposing and fragrant dark green pine forests bold enough to impose themselves right up to the edge of the windy road as you ascend up to Dalat.

A view of the city from the cable car building

The town itself felt like a Vietnamese version of a Mediterranean coastal town, with the same cliff-built houses and coffee-shops, with locals lazing around on street corners and sporting the same narrow, winding road effect. Dalat's also the home of the beret-wearing, goatee-sporting "bohemian" types. We never did forget where we are though, as the omnipresent, neon-lit “Eiffel Tower” made us feel right at home.

View of the town square with Cho Dalat (Dalat Market on the left)

That damn "Eiffel Tower" is like a "Where's Waldo?" - it pops up everywhere!

The communications tower wasn’t the only Vietnamese kitch, which we’ve all grown to love, on offer: You can rent swan-shaped paddle boats for a spin on the lake, there are neon-lit clubs and coffee-shops, including the Ngoc Lan Eyesore Hotel which mysteriously dominates in the background of all photos, no matter which angle you take them from! Horse-and-carriage rides around the lake, walks in the wilting flower garden (maybe it was just the wrong season), jostling and elbowing other tourists for a spot to pose in front of one of the numerous waterfalls dotting the region – or even taking the “coasterbob” rollercoaster down the hill to the Datanla Falls. You name it, Dalat’s got it in abundance, except we didn’t see any pink, ceramic flamingoes…

A view from a swan

I'm not ashamed to say I loved it immensely, kitsch and all, and not just cause I got to spend it with my kickass girlfriend. The people are damn hospitable. Check out the Dreams Hotel on Pham Dinh Phung Street to see what I mean. The owner, Mrs Dung, has received rave reviews and they’re all justified. The rooms aren’t much to look at, but the accommodating and forthcoming nature of the staff (as well as the killer breakfast with Marmite and Vegemite – a rarity in Vietnam) more than made up for it.

At the Tiger Falls

The people, the weather, the beautiful scenery, (and all the other little weird things like the ghost restaurant we ate at on the Sunday) added up to a pretty damn good weekend and I think Sarah loved her birthday as much as I did.

The cable car that takes you over a 2.3 km expanse of green foliage to a reservoir and Buddhist monastry

A view of Xuan Huong Lake by night

The junglist massive

Some pics from Jungle Beach