Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Minor setback

Battle Cruiser. Boozer. Gaydar. Gay radar (which I only heard for the first time last night. Backne. Back Acne. Some words go well together and make wonderful little roll-off-the-tongue sayings. Two things, which just don’t go that well together, are “washing machine” and “passport”. Now, I’m not referring to my post before last about the metaphorical “washing machine that is my life”, but the real deal. The one that whirs and spits and splutters powder and fabric softener mixed with tangible, hot water in anti-clockwise revolutions. That one. And let me tell you, there’s no word like washport, or passwash or whatever you wanna come up with. They’re like chalk and cheese, which I’d like to write to the good folks at the Oxford Complete English Dictionary about suggesting they change it to detergent and important document.

It happened on Sunday, when Mr Diep’s, our good friend and landlord, younger sister came over to collect my clothes for washing (and I don’t want any grief from anyone for not washing my own clothes, I used to and still would if Diep didn’t insist his sister do it – and I pay her). I’d left the little book in my pants pocket by accident, was away playing football and when I came back – neatly balanced on top of a book, sat my sopping, sodden passport, ruffled like a mangy chicken, looking like something the cat dragged in, dropped in the bog and fished out again. I couldn’t inspect the damage just then so I just left it out to dry until this morning and muffled the screams in my pillow, biting my knuckles until the blood rage drained from my eyes and murder didn’t seem like the best idea since condoms. Actually, I’m pretty easy. After all, it was an honest mistake and half my fault anyways so I’m not that pissed off, just frustrated now. Bygones.




This Myanmar trip might just have incurred its first minor setback. The other problem is that the South African Consulate is up in Hanoi so it’s not just a case of heading over and asking them to take a look at it and make a diagnosis: “I’m sorry son, it’s not going to make it.” So, I think I’m going to take some pics of the worst pages and mail to it them. Hope it works.


Damn bureaucratic red tape. Whatever happened to exploring the world with a handful of coins, perhaps a pirate ship at your disposable, perhaps a peg-leg or parrot and a crew of able seaman? The world was your oyster. Pirates get more booty anyhow.

12 comments:

sailinghome said...

passchine...?

Caz said...

I have noted your thinly veiled plot to set me up menno, and I won't be having any of it. No sirree. You can't make me repeat myself. I just won't do it. We share some readers you know. UUUUGH! Dang you menno, you knew i wouldn't be able to resist.

How do you know if you're a pirate?

You just AAAAARGH!!!!

Phew... I feel better now.

Margie said...

Ahoy Captain, that's a very interesting story. I wonder to how many travellers that's happened? There might be money in passport repairs...

Ten minste het jy nie skeurbuik nie, né? :)

Adam said...

He-he. Dis funny. (En tragies tegelyk...)

Brian said...

Oh Snap!

Anonymous said...

doh!!!

henno said...

You guys are mad. Luckily my mom is a psychologist so I got free sessions when I was a kid. She also said she'd do some regression therapy with me when next I visit to find out if I really was an Irish pirate in my previous life as I stubbornly claim.

loesil said...

Must agree with Henno...what is up with all of you and what do you smoke that I don't?

Alet, ek dink dit is daai mensies wat in die middel van die see (Hawaii??! - ek het gedink die lande en eilande het darem 'n groen kol op 'n kaart, maar duidelik weet Henno iets wat ons nie weet nie) woon wat sulke onsinnighede kwytraak.

loesil said...

O ja, bad luck oor die paspoort. Hopelik kan jy 'n tydelike een organise voor Myanmar, maar ek sal jou nie aanbeveel om foto's na die owerhede te stuur nie. Hulle sal jou uitlag!!

Chi said...

Sorry to hear about your passwash, hope that will be sorted out soon. I did this once before but got away at the Laos immigration desk with a big smile and my UK driving licence! Maybe you should check with the Burma embassy in Hanoi too.

alet said...

Ja loes ek sou ook dink daar sal minstens 'n groen kolletjie wees, maar jy weet die rooi kolle is besig om oor te neem. Mens sou sweer daar is miljoene van ons in die hele Suidelike Afrika soos daai kol in Kaapstad en Pretoria groei.

Sessa said...

haai, check die poes in plastiek.